Jeremy Warmsley – If He Breaks Your Heart acoustic version

My bad! I forgot how much I adore Jeremy Warmsley. It’s the ‘I still won’t stand a chance’ line that gets me every time. Prettiness and heartbreak wrapped in a song

If he breaks your heart
I will break his legs
If he takes the piss
I will break his face
If he fucks it up
I will kill him stone cold dead
If he breaks your heart
Will I stand a chance?

If he hangs around
Like an awful smell
I will have some words
I will keep you safe
If he never gets the message
Written loud and clear
I will write it down
I will take him down
If he breaks your heart
Will I stand a chance?

Ahhh…

If he treats you right
I will be his friend
I will never sing
This song out loud
If he breaks your heart
I will break his legs
If he breaks your heart
I will break his face
If he breaks your heart
I will end him
I

If he breaks your heart
I still won’t stand a chance

Ahhh…

Oooooo…

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Widowspeak – Harsh Realm

 

Lyrics:

Last night I thought of you
Years ago, when bodies grew
An empty home
A vacant Hell
I knew you in the harsh realm
I thought about how it was
I thought about you because
I always
think about you
I always think about you

I always think about you
I always think about you
I always think about you
I always think about you

Handsome Furs – Repatriated

So one of my favourite bands of all time is Wolf Parade an amazing band from Montreal. They reinforce my love of all bands Canadian but alas as of  May 31, 2011- the band is on an indefinite hiatus.

GUTTED!

It appears that Dan Boeckner has decided to focus his energy on his other project Handsome Furs. I’m not quite feeling it , I just thought I’d post this video to see if anyone out there was.

 

 

Sigh! Bring back ‘I’ll believe in anything’

Single life!

Ok although I enjoyed my exploration of the single life and partying every night I think it’s best to retire my party hat.

I’m so sleepy and London town in 45 days.

Meeeeew!

I might actually need a boyfriend to calm me down – lame but true.

Sleeping and eating til I leave

 

Mew!

It’s official my body hates me! This last week has given me more bruises and aches than I know what to do with and now my head is acting like it would like to seperate from my neck. I think this is very cruel as I feed it and give it lots of diet coke.  The injustice.

 

Week long hangover is worth it though. I saw too many friends, had too many good times and learnt a valuable lesson about carpets.

 

Now to take the rest of the next month to veg and finish off my 3 documentary projects. Le sigh!

Timber Timbre- Lonesome Hunter

 

My mood today is best described by this song.

 

What did that bad man put in you?
Did those rotten kids cross a line?
I’m afraid I’ll never understand baby,
I’m so sorry you had such a bad time.
Well I’ve done some truly awful things
And you must be very terrified
Well you have every reason to be frightened
Since you been reading my mind
Who am I to deny this moment
And who am I to even question it?
There is a cross on a mountain baby
There is a cross glowing over your head
Please break this spell you have me under
Every heart is a lonesome hunter
Please break this spell you have me under
Every heart is a lonesome hunter

Sparrows at your window
Starlings at your door
Magpies wherever we go
Is it blackbirds forevermore
Well I’m standing holding my head
And I’m staring through a hole in your head
And I been feeling like a zombie baby
I am a zombie coming slow to your bed
Who am I to deny this moment
And who am I to even question it?
There is a cross on a mountain baby
There is a cross glowing over your head
Please break this spell you have me under
Every heart is a lonesome hunter
Please break this spell you have me under
Every heart is a lonesome hunter
Is a lonesome hunter
Is a lonesome hunter
Every heart is a lonesome hunter

Food Poisoning

If it looks like food poisoning, feels like food poisoning and tastes like food poisoning … it probably is food poisoning.

Meeeeeew!

Tried to eat a yummy chicken lasagna only for it to land up in the trashcan at work. I didn’t even make it into the bathroom. Ewwwww

I feel like I’ve been run over by a van

How I feel right now

No chickens were harmed in the stealing of this image

Dating!

So I got asked on a date! EEK! I accepted due to fear of being alone forever, only to cancel this morning. I feel bad but I’m no where  near ready to get my heart broken again!

The situation does remind me of my first and only bitch ditch.

I was 12 and this guy at school asked me out, actually he’d been very obviously in love with me for the year and had been asking me out once a week since I arrived at Grayston Primary. The one day after school I had a moment of weakness and finally said yes. He was over joyed and went off to play a game of tennis (as one does- I assume-when one is sporty), I watched the game and by half time when he had a mouth fill of an orange slice I cancelled… my reason? After watching him play tennis I realised he weighed about 40kg to my 50kg (chubby loving) and the idea of him actually sticking his skinny tongue in my mouth was too much for my 12 year old brain.

He was devastated and I was horrified I’d caused so much pain in the 45 minutes we’d been ‘dating’. Definitely horrified enough to never bitch ditch til now, luckily this guy is nice and was more interested in my company  (I assume) than a life time commitment.

I just want it to be 3 months in the future I’ll be in London and I won’t have to be sad or feel awkward.

Therapist says one day at a time but I want to sleep til August, lucky I’m busy and have awesome friends to get me through this and maybe someday soon I won’t cancel a date, maybe someday soon I’ll be in love again 🙂

OLD!

I woke up to a startling realisation… I’m old.

I don’t think I help myself by having a 21 year old boyfriend. Sigh!

It’s just I’m going through an insecure phase and despite being the lowest weight of my adult life, having good hair and a London wardrobe in South Africa, I’m pretty depro.

I can’t help but compare myself to all the young beautiful woman I see out. I just don’t know how to make myself feel better. It’s especially hard when your boyfriend is not comfortable complimenting.

Got job, got car, got boyfriend, got enough money to buy milk. Life should be good

Mew!

I just feel like moving back to SA has put my back emotionally five years. I feel the same insecurity I did in high school but none of the hope that its only one more year til I go to uni.

I’m sure it’ll get better once I settle down more but it’s been a year since I moved back and I’m very unsure it was the right decision.

I was so independent and self assured there and I’ve regressed in SA.

I think it’s the whole caring about someone more than yourself. I was very selfish there. I was there for friends but didn’t really open up my heart to anyone else.

When you put your heart in someone else’s hands you risk a lot and I think thats the problem.

I’ve been burned more than a few times by men and now I feel like they do this because I’m not good enough. I kinda know it’s not true but the flirting with other girls is really getting me down.

I don’t like that I leave a club after a big fight in tears and I wake up the next day to boyfriends 6 new gorgeous facebook friends. All girls at the club. I don’t get to ask because that would imply I don’t trust but theres a level of respect that says before the person you love asks why not volunteer the information.

Mew/Sigh

Insecurity is like an illness without cure

Miserable Day…

Winters began and just in time for me to receive a new summer wardrobe from the States side brother. Sigh!

I love Winter but when the weather matches my mood too completely I get introspective – never good.

Robert Frost – ‘STOPPING BY WOODS ON A SNOWY EVEVNING’

Whose woods these are I think I know
His house is in the village though
He will not see me stopping here
To watch his woods fill up with snow

My little horse must think it queer
To stop without a farm house near
Between the woods and frozen lake
The darkest evening of the year

He gives his harness bells a shake
To ask if there is some mistake
The only other sound is the sweep
Of easy wind and downy flake

The wood are lovely dark and deep
But I have promises to keep
And miles to go before I sleep
And miles to go before I sleep……